It's a bum job, but it has to be done

Hello. How do you fancy a poo picking stick from Amazon. Superduper deluxe version for only £46. Saves bending down, saves your back, keep the footpaths clean and poo free. No more accidentally squelching through it and scraping it off your boots. Handy gadget eh! Maybe the council could buy a load and give them away free, nope, probably can't afford it. 

One of these would have been absolutely no good to me this morning. I sat drinking my coffee looking out over the back garden. Rocky seemed to be struggling to do his business, at last the offending lump dropped onto the ground. Success. Then he squatted again, not quite finished, there's more, I thought. Oh dear, nothing happening, obviously he was a bit uncomfortable so I went out to check what was going on at his back end.

Oh my, a great wadge of the stuff was clinging to his hairy arse and wouldn't let go. I got a piece of toilet roll to remove it, no luck, it's clinging on for dear life. I'll see to it in a minute, I thought, when I've finished my coffee. He didn't like me closing the door and leaving him out there. No Rocky, you aint coming in here.

Now, what equipment is needed to poo pick from a dog's bum, not the stick above that's for sure. Boil a kettle of water, and find some old rags for washing it off. Empty an old washing up bowl used for catching rainwater, and mix hot and cold water together to get it to the right temperature. Could do with a doggy bidet actually. But there's such a lot of it, it's going to need cutting out, which scissors, large or small, best take two pairs out. Don't fancy getting it on my hands, good job I've got some heavy duty rubberized gardening gloves.

I don't think he is going to stand still while I do all this, so I'd better put his collar on so I can stop him wriggling free if he gets upset. Now, if anyone else find's they have to do this, follow my instructions. Put dog close to your legs, between them if you have to. Lift tail with your left hand, they don't like this, and carefully snip around the offending lump, a few hairs at a time, and being careful not to get too close to the skin. Keep snipping until there are very few hairs left supporting it. Eventually it will drop to the ground.

Check that you have cut out as much as you can, and while you are at it, trim the hairs all around the area in case it happens again, so that the poo has nothing to cling on to. This will hopefully ensure a clean evacuation next time.

To finish off soak a cloth in warm water and wash the dog's rear end. He won't like it and will sit down. Talk to him nicely, tell him what a good boy he is, or girl if you have a lady dog. Don't pull his tail to get him to stand up, lift gently under his belly. A few sloshes with warm water should clean off any residue. Have a dry cloth nearby to wipe away any excess water.

And there you are, happy dog, and no skid marks on the carpet. Hope this has been a helpful post ;o)
Have a nice Saturday. Toodle pip.